Last Day of my Life
by Lillebule
Summary: Done in the same fashion as "First Day of my Life."  Esmeralda's thoughts/emotions during crutial moments in her life.  Most of the chapters don't contain mature content, one does.
1. Chapter 1

This is my Freedom.

Book based. Sort of done in the same spirit of "First Day of my Life." It's based on 2 events in Esmeralda's life.

I am writing this fic backwards.

Chapter 1: Esmeralda's inner monologue as she is about to be hanged.

Chapter 2: Esmeralda's thoughts after Claude's confession.

Chapter 3: The night Esmeralda and Phoebus meet up at LaFalordel's.(Please note…this one will contain mature content of a sexual nature. If you are easily offended by such content then why are you reading something with an "M" rating anyways? And you might want to skip this chapter if you are easily offended.)

As always reviews are greatly accepted, flames not so much.

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I can't remember why. I can't remember why I am here today. The sky is so blue, the sun so warm! The sun, my sun, my Phoebus. That cannot possibly be why I am here. Who could believe it? I love him, who could believe that a woman can kill the man she loves? Oh Phoebus! All you would have to do is send a sign, reappear somehow and tell them! Tell them that I did not do this evil thing and they will surely let me go. And then Phoebus we can be together and I will love you freely.

What is this chanting? And that man, what is he doing here? Yes, that vile man leading the other priests. Phoebus come look him in the eyes and let them know that this man is the one who killed you. Oh Phoebus! But do you know why he has killed you? The coward who stabbed you from behind came last night and told me so.

Being shoved and pulled, feeling hands on me, bruising my flesh. And wax, what good will this do? What are these men saying? Such an odd tongue and I do not understand a word of it. Why do they kneel? What is it that they are praying for exactly? My death, their safety and all while I pray only for the swiftness of death. Why must death take so long, when all I want is to be with you my love?

And there he is waiting for me. That horrid monk! I hate him, I would claw out his eyes if my hands were not bound. How is he not bound, will he too hang? Oh! His breath, the grotesque stench and heat on my neck! He speaks, asking for one last time if I will love him and not you. He laughs in your face, knowing full well that I will never love any but you Phoebus. He has seen something…something that frightens him greatly! Oh you have come to save me! But now I fear the hour is too late and I can feel the rope tightening, as my body is lifted away by your angel.


	2. Chapter 2

Book based. Sort of done in the same spirit of "First Day of my Life." It's based on 2 events in Esmeralda's life.

I am writing this fic backwards.

Chapter 1: Esmeralda's inner monologue as she is about to be hanged.(Written in first person perspective.)

Chapter 2: Esmeralda's thoughts during/after Claude's confession.(Not in first person.)

Chapter 3: The night Esmeralda and Phoebus meet up at LaFalordel's.(Please note…this one will contain mature content of a sexual nature. If you are easily offended by such content then why are you reading something with an "M" rating anyways? And you might want to skip this chapter if you are easily offended. Also written in first person perspective.)

As always reviews are greatly accepted, flames not so much.

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"Who are you?"

It was the first time in what seemed like centuries that she had heard her own voice. The sound was weak, barely a whisper and hollow. The sound echoed off the moist stone walls with little effort and startled her. Following her voice came another; it was deeper, baritone and smooth. It took a while for these words to process and as they did she squinted, trying to remember where she had heard that voice before. Sadly the memories were so far off that she no longer knew if she remembered anything.

The voice of the priest was calm as he asked if she was prepared for death. She assumed that he was there to hear her confession and she was more than ready to once again confess her love for Phoebus. How far away that idea seemed now, the idea of Phoebus, of hope! And then the priest spoke again, telling her to take his hand. At first she could feel the warmth radiate from the thin hand, but as she felt the fingertips she could feel nothing but cold. It had been too long since she had felt anything, but cold.

With a few more exchanges of words which seemed now foreign to her, the priest lifted his cowl and she could see his face. A scram was caught in her throat, for she knew not if she could still scream. She now remembered where she had heard that hypnotic baritone; he had watched her dance, cursing her and more importantly he had killed her bright sun.

"Oh Phoebus."

It was an involuntary whisper of the only words she could muster. The priest sat, giving his confession and begging her to feel something for him. In truth she did. She felt hatred, she felt anger and most of all she felt numb. And of all the things she needed to ask him; why he loved her, where he would take her, if she would be safe all her numb brain could think of were two small words.

"Oh Phoebus."

She wanted to lean against the man sitting next to her, just to feel something more than the cold, just to feel some solace! He was the only one who knew she was innocent of attacking the captain and she wanted to tell him that she understood why he had stabbed Phoebus, but for some reason those thoughts were buried within her feeble mind. All that was certain to her now were her physical surroundings and nothing more.

The rage began to build up, the desire to slash his skin with her nails! She would say her love's name a thousand times if it meant watching this terrible priest's face register pain and anguish! If he had truly loved her, he would have placed her somewhere warm, with no sentence to hang, with the sunshine and open air. She wanted her vocal chords to screech that. Only vague sounds of syllables would come forth.

"I…aaa…Phoebus."

A choice was being given. If she were to die she would forever be with Phoebus and that was her choice. She no longer desired the feeling of the numb earth and if death was the only way to ever feel anything then she would gladly choose that.


End file.
